trusty armor.

Dan,

wear your trust like a bulletproof vest,
it will make you feel safe
but in the very act of wearing it
you are putting yourself
in the line of fire

you can't hunt love
without a vest

before you can get it to surrender,
you'll have to take a few hits

but always carry your trusty armor
it's your first line of defense

happy hunting,

Dave

it's always the beginning of the end.

we are all fools
running in the darkness

when everything is right
we are high on
repression & independence

like a junkie

when it's time to come down
when we are no longer
getting what we think we need

we destroy everything,
and banish those around us
who know the truth
and rebuild

to keep our pride intact
we take solace in the fact

although we have destroyed
everything around us,

there was success
in the illusion
of rebuilding ourselves again

repeat

superposition and the death of dialecticism.

I was sitting on the patio of a creperie alleging that superposition could be applied to much more than just quantum computing. As human beings, we apply theories and concepts to practicality never realizing that those theories could one day wake up in the synthesis of another doctrine. Superposition is simply that that a piece of matter can be in more than one state at once. Interesting when applied to a thought. Thoughts are a form of matter. But unlike concrete physical reality, thoughts are constantly changing shape and state. This is why there have been no satisfying answers to age old philosophical debates like free will.


We have been working in the habit of creating synthesis out of dichotomies. It has been the hallmark of most of the scientific and creative breakthroughs throughout the centuries. In philosophy, this form of inquiry is called dialecticism. In dialecticism, as you may know, you take a hypothesis and deduce it into a theses and antitheses to come to a final synthesis. What this proves is that there is resolution for two opposing ideas through strict speculation,reasoning and gathering of factual data.
Dialecticism is incongruent with the new (and some old) questions science and philosophy pose. Why do we still apply it? It's comfortable.


How could two things exist in the same space and time at once? Ask the quantum scientists. With this field of science growing more and more into a feasible reality, I believe it will not only shape the way we use computers but will also change how we look at philosophy, logic, and computational models in the cognitive sciences. It will break down most of our current methodologies of thinking. For example, let us take a look at applying superposition to moral theory. Two opposing doctrines of religion and how they can co exist together both as true. Dialecticism to me seems as good to us as unpasteurized milk. It could flush relativism down the toilet taking the pope with it in one fell swoop.


The wake of a new paradigm in thought is never met with ease. The mystery at the bottom of the rabbit hole has always been a mystery in itself. The only way to change the world is to change our thinking. Nothing is certain. But, just like natural selection, we run around with our ideas and own up to them whether they are right or wrong and whether they succeed or fail. That is progress. Progress doesn't need a brain behind the gun -- just take a look at how well the brainless DNA molecule has done in the past few millenia. How can humans peacefully co exist on this planet without having to worry about over consumption? How can we as humans balance opposing thoughts and doctrines in belief systems without imposing war? How can a 1 and a 0 exist together in the same space and time? Can homosexuals and heterosexuals live in tandem without being seen as different? Can free will and fate exist together and share the same outcomes? Without having to prove a point -- a synthesis. A synthesis only leads to more questioning. More questions lead to more time being wasted. We value time as our most precious asset, yet we don't realize how much time we waste in indecision and debate.


I hope the new grounds we break in quantum mechanics can be someday be applied to disciplines such as moral theory, environmentalism, politics, etc. We may never find that magical equation to explain the universe, but we may find a way to sustain equilibrium more efficiently by understanding there is room for more than one idea in this world. Knowing this, we could be a little more at peace.

Some informative reading:

More Info on Dialectic
Quantum Computing
A Quantum State of Mind

heaven knows i'm innocent.

i swallowed you
before i could savor
how sweet you were

it's a crime here on earth
for mortals to feast on those they love
only heaven knows we're innocent

i don't worry
because we become one
in digestion

fill er' up!

We all are born deserving happiness, it is our intrinsic birthright. I think most people wouldn't have a difficult time accepting that statement as true. Regardless of how you choose to define happiness, it is a culmination of a profound number of emotions all coming together creating harmony in one singular moment or instance. How you achieve this happiness is up to you; be it in an ethical or non ethical fashion can be left for another discussion.

A constant stream of happiness is a pipe dream, but it is what many people strive for. It can also be the source of a great amount of frustration and disappointment. People fail to recognize that things exist out of dichotomies. What isn't taken into consideration is the fact that 'bad' times are necessary to make the good times roll. When the human will is battered and broken, it is like trying to see the sun shine through during heavy cloud cover. Absolute love is like the sun which is a constant. While fleeting or human love is affected by cloud cover and is imperfect in nature. Emotions can act like clouds. Sometimes the sun can shine through and fill you with love if you let it, provided you can clear the skies. It is idealistic behavior that sets us up for disappointment.

I discussed a bit about idealism in a previous entry. We often think, "this is the way it should be" not, "this is the way things are". An unwillingness to accept the state of how things are stems from grievances and is a warning sign for idealist thinking. We all put up walls because we are afraid whatever happened in the past will happen again and we will be thrown into a state of despondency. This is a vicious cycle. It keeps the love from shining through in our mind. We keep these walls up expecting others to be able to disarm them, and when they can't, we mistake that for them not being able to love us the 'right' way. We go from lover to lover, friend to friend, thinking we will find someone who will finally truly understand us.

It is common in relationships to expect the other person to instill love into you. When we feel they aren't doing this, it creates conflict. Others cannot be held responsible for the voids we find in ourselves. Relying on others to fill you up means that you are empty.

How things should be is a directly affected by every instance and moment you lived up to the point where you realized it. Here again we can easily scapegoat external influences for being at the fault of our unhappiness. Rage, anger, fear, etc. that we direct outward reflects a part of ourselves that we haven't fully dealt or come to terms with.
We tend to be attracted to people who are filled with love and naturally gravitate towards them in hopes to catch a few droplets. These are people who are at peace with themselves. Not perfect peace, but peace enough to hold them over. It is almost like money, some people have a lot, some people have very little. You should never let your heart go in debt and expect someone else to loan you some. Payback is a bitch. Wanting love and happiness puts a bad frame around your aura..Needing love on the other hand is essential and natural and it will come to you if you are all Ok within yourself. People sense internal peace like a geiger counter, they will gravitate towards you, just fill yourself up and know that you are enough.

Wow Man.

well the night is over
you can take your bow
you made yourself so proud
you were dancing in the glory of the
wows

from all the holier than thous
i didn't even get a smile or a glance
from the Wow Man

you try so hard to be
everybody's favorite Wow Man

that you forget about me
and everything that you and i have
you're so desperate to be everybody's
favorite Wow Man

that you forget how to be
good enough for me

fool
dragging your foul mood around
much to the sound of the
jealous words your father said
and the discontent your mother
plants into your head
have turned you into a fool

close all the doors in the room
the room where you weep until noon
you'd wish the day away
cause there's nothing left to say or do
in this persistent gloom

there are times in your life
when everyone says you owe them
just shut out all the noise
look at me
you don't need to be lonesome

abandon all your tortured plans
before this love slips
through your hands

throw down your change and kiss the tip.

idealism.

While I was away, nature told me that idealism was a nightmare that we would all awaken from someday. I looked around and saw that my clothes were an idea, my flashlight was an idea..but my breathing, the grass, flowers, lake, birds..whose ideas were those?

I can discern between reality and my ideas reflecting what my perceptions tell me what reality is. It's the finest line. This hints to me that an idea isn't just limited to a neurophysiological process; ideas can exist without a conscious observer. There is a distinction between thinking and being.

Being is a process more akin to feeling. Thinking is akin to cognition. When and if you cease your thoughts, your being or self blends into the background or whatever 'existence' may be defined as. This activity is widely known as meditation or ego death. Look at existence as a sort of 'backdrop' (since being is a singular or monistic, it has to be seen as one entity) When we think, we fade back out of the backdrop and expose ourselves to the foreground. We become distinguished as individuals.

It's a difficult thing to visualize. The more cognizant you are, the stronger you exist, the more you stand out from the backdrop of existence. What ideals plague us?
That is something I will be asking people this week.